I wasn't ready, I may never be
by Taw2541
Summary: After 4x06, Sara goes to see Oliver before she leaves Star City. One-Shot.


As a tennis ball was shot in the air an arrow was then immediately fired and pinned it to the wall by Oliver. As he waited for another tennis ball to be fired, he then heard the footsteps of someone walking to him, it was Sara Lance; his recently resurrected friend and ex-lover.

"Nice shooting as always, Oliver," Sara commented as Oliver then fired another arrow once he heard the machine launch another ball into the air.

"Morning, come to train?" Oliver asked.

"Come to say goodbye." She replied.

"Goodbye, why?" He said puzzled.

"You know why." She reminded him. "Last night, I ... I killed a ghost."

"Yeah in the heat of a firefight." He reminded her.

"And before that, I nearly beat someone to death during a simple item retrieval." She retorted. "This ... this bloodlust, I need to find a way to get a handle on it. Until I do I'm too dangerous to be around."

Putting down his bow and turning off the machine, he then walked over to her. "You know Sara, you said something awfully similar to me when you broke things off between us." He stated.

"What's that suppose to mean?" She asked a little defensive.

"I don't know maybe instead of actually sticking around to deal with your problems and letting people who actually love and care about you help you, you just run away instead!" He said a little angrier than he intended.

"Ollie!" She exclaimed.

"I'm sorry." He said trying to calm himself. "Look, Sara ... the last time you left ... I should have stopped you not just because of us but because I know, I know what it feels like to be a dangerous influence on people; that the darkness inside you can taint them, ruin them even. I still feel that way sometimes." He explained.

"How do you deal with it?" She asked after a brief pause.

"I don't know, I ... I think surrounding myself with people to convince me otherwise helps." He said reluctantly. "But not always."

"Ollie. Deep down, deep down I know your probably right but ... but I need to figure that out on my own." She answered.

"I know you do. It's why I've never made a big deal about it because it took me a long time to figure that out too. I just didn't want to make the same mistake as I did last time, letting you walk away from me and your family so easily." He admitted.

"I appreciate that. Listen, Ollie while we're on the subject ... I'm sorry for ending things the way I did between us." She spoke.

"Sara, you don't have to -" He replied as she then interrupted him.

"But I do Ollie. I ... I didn't just dump you because I thought you deserved someone better and less damaged than me. I ended things between us because when you brought up us ... maybe living together, I ... I realized I didn't want that. Oliver, it wasn't because I didn't have real feelings for you I did you know that. It's just when I think about actually spending my life with someone I get scared for reasons ... reasons I don't fully understand." She reluctantly admitted.

"Well, I guess only one of us got over our commitment issues after the Gambit." He mentioned.

"Guess so." She replied with a slight smile. "Ollie the truth was ... is because I wasn't ready, I may never be."

"Well, it's probably for the best. I mean, it must say something about us when not too long after that you went back to Nyssa and I told Felicity that I loved her."

"Yeah, I guess it does say something about us. Maybe, in the end, you and I are better off being friends." She mused.

"Yeah maybe, I mean, I'm happy with Felicity, really happy." He stated.

"And, I'm happy for you ... both of you. Still, I gotta admit a part of me thought that after we were done, you and Laurel would give it another shot." She said mentioning her sister.

"I think we both know that after everything that's happened, the ship sailed on me and her a long time ago." He replied. "Sara, are sure there's nothing that I can say or do to convince to not leave this time?"

"Sorry, no." She admitted.

Walking over to her, Oliver wrapped his arms around Sara to hug her. "Well, then be safe and ... and try not to die again." Looking her in the face. "Sorry, too soon?"

"A little but I'll let it pass." She chuckled. "Bye, Ollie." She said then kissed him on the cheek then walked away.

"Sara." He spoke highly causing her to turn around. "If or when you get over these issues that you have about commitment, just know that whoever you decide to be with, really be with; their gonna be one lucky man."

"Or woman." She smirked.

"Yeah, or woman," He said chiding himself for forgetting to mention that as she left the bunker.

* * *

**Author's Notes: So I've gotten a tiny bit of heat regarding my opinions about Oliver and Sara's relationship in Season 2. So I took another look at it and I think this fits the reason for their breakup much better. Sara has some apparent commitment issues, back then when Oliver brought up the idea of them living together she was clearly conflicted about it. Even in her relationship with Ava, Sara can only manage partly living with someone. While it's clear she's making progress on it in Legends, as she's less afraid about her past coming back to haunt her and the person she loves; back then she wasn't. Sometimes you can be in love with someone and yet not be ready for the commitment that comes with it and that's what I think happened between them.**

**As for my comment about Oliver and Laurel, I swear it wasn't a shipping thing. Since S2, Sara has always acknowledged how connected Oliver and Laurel still seem to be despite not being together. In fact, I sometimes wonder if Oliver and Laurel getting ready to marry in the Dominator reality wasn't just part of Oliver's desire but Sara's as well; in order to see her sister be happy and in love with Oliver once more.**


End file.
